FUCK YELLOW CAB OF SEATTLE

It's 2:00 a.m. I just got back in from a very long 48 hours, nearly half of which I spent working. Had a two day business conference. Then an after party, which didn't go late, but clearly I did by American standards. So here I sit, three beers and an entire 10 inch cheese pizza later, still pissed off about my last two Yellow Cab experiences.

My drivers were fine. The cars were clean. I reached my destinations safely and punctually. But when I arrived at my destination however, the cab driver gave me a total that was $2 more than what the meter read. The first driver declared a $2 fuel surcharge. The other didn't. No where is this "charge" posted. Either way I think they're full of shit, so I didn't tip either of those fucking thieving bastards.

Let me tell you something. I am the 20% tip guy. You have to really grate my nuts for me to not tip even close to 20%. But $2 is nearly a half gallon of gas. I was only going 8 blocks, in both cases. So not only am I being charged handsomely for service, but I'm also more than paying for these guys to fill up their gas guzzlers. I'm pretty sure these cab drivers and/or companies are taking advantage of over speculated oil futures and basically charging themselves a 50% tip. It's not the money so much as it is the principle. FUCKERS!

Here I am, trying to be a responsible party goer by cabbing it. From now on I'm driving drunk or bumming rides from total strangers. I think they call that hitch hiking. Or better yet, I'll get drunk, commandeer someone else's ride, then smash it into the side of a Yellow Cab and flee the scene undiscovered. Surcharge that, motherfuckers.