Acknowledging I'm aware they do not expect me to have all the answers, I shared how grateful I am they told me what about this. I mean that, too. Regardless what brand of suffering someone is dealing with, it's so important to have someone to talk with about it.
The connection between the addiction and lack of emotional connection with others came to light during this conversation. I've read some scientific studies showing a correlation between strong community and lack of substance abuse/addiction.
My friend also confided feeling depressed, that their marriage is hanging in the balance. Also being a working parent, it's clear to see this could all quickly become overwhelming. I'm sure it already is. I asked my friend if there was one thing in their life right now that changed for the better and would have the greatest impact on her life, what would it be. They said their marriage. I fully supported their sincere answer and gave them a recommendation for a wonderful couple's counselor.
Being able to leverage the love of a solid marriage will surely benefit a battle with addiction. I can't foresee someone going it alone on that path. We also talked about change, whether they are truly ready for it. At first they tried to convince themselves or me they've been functional for so long. I reminded them their marriage being on rocky ground is likely a byproduct of the addiction.
Also, I am not a parent. I do understand parenthood to a degree as well as motherly instinct. I've also done my fair share of drugs over years past. So I'm no one to judge. Regardless of my experience I am no one to judge. I pointed out if they were using and some unfortunate accident occurred involving their child, they would be unlikely to ever forgive themselves. I know such circumstance would haunt me to my grave no matter how much I meditated.
I don't know what will come of today's exchange with my beloved friend. I am optimistic they are ready to change, to battle and triumph over the addiction. This is a long journey, not for the faint of heart. My friend has a wonderful, joyful and loving heart. Truly a good human through and through. We all have our demons.
Tonight my husband and I went out, to a club, a really cool ass club in SODO (South of Downtown). It's called Monkey Loft. They have a newish rooftop deck and two skilled DJs were at it. Apparently every Thursday in the summer months they have a free happy hour there. This coincided with another long time friend's birthday, which was actually yesterday. We were tight senior year.
His fiancé is a doll. She took me aside tonight to let me know what a positive difference I've made in her life. Apparently introducing her to my energist has helped her clear some things that she had been wanting to work through for quite some time. She also said friends of hers also experienced positive changes as a result of their work with my energist. I cannot take all the credit. My energist was referred to me by a dear friend, and my energist does incredible work.
Anywhere I can make a positive difference in someone's life, especially in these uncertain times, I am truly grateful, honored and humbled. My ego would like to take the credit. Truth be told these people did the work. They made the changes.
As my husband and I were leaving, there was a mix playing with lyrics which stated: "There's a force in the universe, all you need to do is get in touch with it, and let things happen ..."
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