Day Three

From left to right: A portrait of our beloved Daschund Millie and yours truly today from my living room sofa.

My in-laws departed after dinner last night. It's good to have them here. My husband really loves them, and I do, too. Have been grateful to have people around while I'm managing this very rigorous new treatment course. At the same time, I'm not feeling my best. Grateful to be far from my worst, too. Long story short, I don't know that I was as pleasant to be around. Kind of got the sense the folks don't fully get what I'm grappling with, and that's OK. Brighter days are on the horizon.

It's raining again this morning, fairly heavily, like it did on Saturday. My husband left for work early as he had a big day ahead of him at the shop. I've been feeling rather fatigued this morning, more so than usual. It kind of suddenly washed over me like a wave when I was in the middle of breakfast and chatting up a most dear friend on the phone. As such, I'm feeling a little uneasy about being home alone to manage today.

Then again, I'm not totally alone. I have our trusty dog nurse Millie to look after me. She's most therapeutic. My neighbor across the street is home today, and has let me know to call if I need anything. Also my mom is about 10 min. away. I sent her a text this morning to see how she's doing and let her know how I'm doing as well as the possibility of needing her help.

The sound of the steadily falling rain outside and its pitter-patting on the roof is soothing, as is the dimmer daylight from a solid medium gray sky. The weather feels as though I have full permission to stay in my PJs, which I've been in since Sat. night, and just mostly rest. Except for the rain and the sloshing of the occasional passing car, and even less occasional plane overhead, it's otherwise quiet. I like that. I enjoy the silence. It's peaceful. Tranquil.

The past few nights I have to urinate sometime around 2:00-3:00 a.m. It feels like a release of toxins, and it's a little unpleasant. After returning to bed it takes me a little while to get back to sleep. I awaken feeling pretty tired in the mornings, then a while after getting up to take my thyroid meds I begin to feel more awake and energetic. After breakfast I'm feeling pretty good, typically. Today is a bit different.

This whole showering twice daily for 10 min. is odd. First off it's wasteful. I'm to do this before each round of antibiotics so my blood vessels are as dilated as possible. This apparently allows more flow of the antibiotics in my blood so they can be much more effective. The morning shower is much better than the evening. In the morning I wash myself. This process has drawn my attention to how long I normally take in the shower, anywhere from three to five minutes. So the evening shower, while it feels great, also seems a bit overindulgent. Yet I do understand this is for a specific purpose. Add to the overindulgent piece we just completed adding a master bath to our home, which is quite luxurious feeling, with this incredible (I'm sure it's not eco friendly) rain shower head ... It's dreamy and feels spa like as well as therapeutic. OK, I am grateful for this. I'm just not accustomed to using so much water. Typically I shower about every other day. My husband thinks I'm party hippie.

My body is undergoing many changes internally. I am optimistic this is putting me on track to wellness. I look so forward to the day I am beyond this and can live my daily life with ease and vitality.